Kemal Needs A Man
Fed-up with the lack of male totty in the House, Kemal visited
the Diary Room tonight to persuade Big Bro to bring a hunk
With the exception of Roberto, there hasn't really been much
in way of male 'talent' this year for either the girls or
the boys to ogle. Derek is pretty fit, but is no doubt seen
as an old biddy by young-enough-to-be-his-son Kemal.
A deluded Maxwell thought he could have been something of
'a sort' if he lost the puppy fat, but he was never gonna'
be Brad Pitt was he? And Craig isn't exactly a picture, his
boyish looks ruined by his angry, distressed-looking face
a lot of the time.
Well, Science is Science and although he's possibly quite
fit (skinny?) his personality is probably enough to turn any
would-be admirer off.
About Eugene, what can we say without sounding harsh? He's
got a pasty-white, wimpy body, he ain't the best-looking bloke
and he doesn't exactly have a Hollywood smile.
Now we're starting to sound really superficial, aren't we?
How apt for BB6?!
The only other male housemate to consider is Anthony. The
Geordie dancer does have a toned body and a pretty face, but
presumably stiletto-wearer Kemal is looking for someone who's
actually taller than the notoriously midget-like entertainer
And anyway, Anthony is already taken. Sort of.
Back in the Diary Room, Kemal asked the all-seeing entity
if the cameramen behind the mirrors were naked and fit. Quite
why they would be naked is anyone's guess.
Mind you, we don't know what those guys get up to in the confines
of that camera run and frankly, we don't want to!
Big Brother didn't answer, but that didn't stop Kemal revealing
that he felt a bit sexually lacking in the House. "It's
come to the point where I need a man and to be honest, there
ain't nothing much in here," said the 19-year-old.
All the omnipresent one could suggest was that Kemal finds
a way to relieve himself, perhaps following Craig's recent
Flirting with the male voice proved fruitless and Big Bro
wasn't forthcoming with the requested jazz mags and vids to
help Kemal out of his 'frustrating' situation.
Bah! Men... who needs 'em?!
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