Craig Is A Fake (Tanner!)
Craig has something of the 'David Dickinson' about him tonight,
appearing like he's fallen into a large vat of fake tanning
Ex-'Bargain Hunt' presenter Dickinson is famous for having
a perma-tan all year round, but Craig's unnatural hue is an
easy match for the cult hero's colour.
That said, he's more 'orange' than golden brown but is proud
of his Tango-tan and tonight declared, "I'm glowing,
I'm like a light bulb".
Hey, you know what 'The Duke' Dickinson would have called
the (in Craig's eyes) best-looking housemate?
A right Bobby Dazzler!
PS. Look out for the oft-cringeworthy but compelling antics
and puns of the ex-con antiques expert in his forthcoming
BBC1 show, 'Dealing With Dickinson'.
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