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Singing For Sausage(s)

This bunch of housemates are definitely late-risers compared to previous contestant groups, but then they know that their first meal of the day at the moment is stodgy slop. So, Big Bro gave the group an incentive to get up today.

The all-seeing entity set the housemates a task whereby they had 30 minutes to write a song and then each perform a section of it. If they succeeded, they would get a non-slop brekkie.

Okay, so Big Bro wasn't promising a full English, but anything is a step-up from that 'orrible gruel, so the they duly dived-in and started composing.

Well, we say that, but they basically re-hashed Sam and Amanda's annoying little 'Introduce yourself. No way' song, and the resulting tuneage – to use a Tracey'ism – went like this:

I'm Amanda,
Loves pink,
I'm girly don't ya think?

I'm Billi,
I'm sexy,
The girls they love to text me.

I'm Brian,
I'm pukka,
I'm such a dirty mukka.

I'm Carole,
I'm cool,
I do aerobics in the pool.

I'm Chanelle,
I'm posh
Wanna' be rolling in the dosh.

I'm Gerry,
I'm Greek,
I'm such a sexy freak.

I'm Charley,
I'm hot,
I'm everything you're not.

I'm Johnny,
Not Boney,
I've got lots of mo-ney.

I'm Laura,
I'm fun,
I'm the only Welsh one.

I'm Liam,
I'm canny,
I love to get with the f...(ahem!)

I'm Nicky,
I'm hot,
I'm about to lose the plot.

I'm Sam,
I'm sweet,
The guys think I'm a treat.

I'm Tracey,
I'm a raver,
I'm a hardcore cheesy quaver.

I'm Ziggy,
Great hair,
The girls they like to stare.

Which was interspersed with a chorus of:

BB8 is the place to be,
Where the sun is shining,
We're a family.

There are times of laughter,
There are times we cry,
But the hardest thing is when we say 'Goodbye'.

Luckily for the group, Big Bro's standards were lower than Ronnie Corbett's knees, and they duly passed the task. Woo-hoo!

As a reward, they were supplied with juice, tea bags, bread, milk and, er... one solitary sausage.

Still, after a mini-argument over the measly amount of meat, they shared out the luxury grub and were as happy as a gaggle of tramps in a cardboard factory!

Check back soon for more Big Brother UK Latest News                          < back    top

 

 



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