Derek Calls First House Meeting
Just three days into the new series and already the housemates
have felt the need to call a full house meeting.
Chaired by eldest housemate Derek, the group gathered around
at 1.30pm today to discuss the controversial matter of the
bedroom lights being switched-on when people are asleep.
Political man 'Del Boy', the group’s affectionate name
for the 40-year-old speech writer, managed to keep strict
order in the house throughout the proceedings.
Anyone with something to say on the matter had to stick their
hand in the air before they were permitted to speak, primary-school
But after plenty of deliberation, the group agreed that the
lights should go off as soon as the first person goes to bed,
as long as that's after Midnight.
But Derek's planned demands for the ultimate controller of
the house lighting, Big Brother, were rather elaborate, not
to mention ambitious:
The well-spoken Londoner thought that Big Bro should dim
the bedroom lights at 12.30am and also put the blind half-way
down, completely switching them off and closing the blind
fully at 1am.
Erm, since when has the all-seeing entity ever complied with
demands like that?
Still, Derek was confident that he could talk Big Bro round,
coolly shouting-down any doubts amongst the group by saying,
"I don’t care about the big guy; I’ll
deal with him!"
The proceedings drew to a close after a majority vote in
favour of the proposed notion, and everyone duly went about
The thing is, in Makosi’s case, that means turning
the lights on deliberately to annoy her peers!
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