Jay: Tough As He Likes To Think?
He was really aggressive on the night of the big bust-up,
threatening violence against much weedier opponent Marco,
but is the big man as tough as he likes to think?
Well, judging by his daily grooming routine, he's a complete
and utter wuss!
Into the early hours of Day 36 and Jay was the last housemate
still up. However, before hitting the sack, the muscleman
headed to the bathroom for one of his customary mega-preening
sessions. Here's how it went:
His chest was duly shaved as smooth as a babies bum, the whole
bod was then moisturised, including his 'award-winning' derierre.
Then came the hair, to which Jay added at least two styling
products and took care sweeping it into his usual 'Troll'
style, before spending another 5 minutes fiddling and tweaking.
The thing is, what is the point of that, when you're just
about to go to bed?
Next, the face was thoroughly cleansed, with the prissy Scot
going over-and-over the same bits again and again. Then came
the moisturiser, which was carefully applied to every nook
and cranny, including the nostrils. Eww.
Don't get us wrong, we're advocates of men looking after their
skin (do they make face packs for men yet?) but tell us, who
spends a few minutes moisturising each eyelid?
The whole thing took an absolute age, with the pretend-bisexual
contestant admiring himself in the mirrors at every opportunity.
We had time to make a cup of tea, walk the dog, write this
story and nip to Tesco, but the pernickety air steward still
hadn't finished his laborious routine. And that's not far
from the truth!
You could almost forgive him if he was a top model or famous
celebrity, but as you are probably aware if you have the gift
of eyesight, Brad Pitt he is not.
So, Jason's got loads of muscles and a temper to match, but
it's a good job he wasn't fighting alongside his legendary
ancestor, the great William Wallace, at the battle of Stirling
Bridge. Can you imagine it?
"Get ready to charge men... hang on, where's Cowen?"
"Moisturising and fixing his hair Sir, he'll be finished
in an hour."
The big girl's blouse!
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