He's Barney, Barney Jones. Of course!
In some kind of sleep-depravation-puggles-your-brain scenario,
Stuart went decidedly silly working into the early hours of
Day 13, and made up a theme tune for Dan's American burger-serving
alter ego, 'Barney Jones'.
With Michelle sat by his side (of course), he experimented
by adding words to his own little ditty, and gradually the
theme tune began to take place. It went something like this:
He does the graveyard shift,
But he never moans,
His friends all get promoted,
But he never moans.
He's the fast... food... KING!
An enthusiastic Dan sang along, but Michelle was bemused by
the amount of effort Stuart had put into developing the pointless
tune, which also had a cartoon-style arm-swinging dance.
Fellow pizza boy Victor then returned to the room and was
treated to a rendition of the Barney Jones theme tune.
"That's the cheesiest...", began the streetwise
Londoner, not needing to end his sentence. He then described
the tune as nonsense, before conceding, "Catchy though,
As Stu repeated the tune, the four fell about laughing, even
analysing the fact that Barney's friends all get promoted
before him. Erm, he's not real guys!
"That's the funniest thing I've ever heard," stated
Stuart unabashed, before going seemingly completely bonkers,
naming his personal microphone Tom and making up a new tune
about 'Tommy The Microphone Boy'.
Stuart, you need to get some sleep mate. Sharpish!
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